Staying Home

I realize I haven't posted anything for a long time. Not that there aren't things to write about, it just happens that at the end of the day, I would much rather spend a little time with my husband than write about "things", trying to find an appropriate picture to match the post, and in all other ways be a "blogger".
This may come as a shock. But I'm no blogger.

But something happened last night that I think is really important that I would actually LIKE to write about. So here we go.

Last night, D and I were sitting in the concert hall waiting for the Giuseppe Verdi's Requiem to begin. As the hall filled, there was a couple sitting behind D who were conversing with people next to D. So, naturally, we could hear everything being said. Not like we were eavesdropping. We weren't. It was just one of those inescapable situations.
The lady who was talking mentioned to her friend that she had enjoyed the privilege of staying at home with her children all the way through their school years.
This seems like a small statement, but I was so glad to hear it.

It IS a privilege to stay home with my children. Sometimes I feel like I need to justify my mom-status to people I meet, or people I know. That somehow, being a stay-at-home mom is not enough. That I need to be doing more "acceptable" things than being with my kids.

Hearing that woman last night was a breath of fresh air. She was not ashamed of being a stay-at-home mom. And I don't have to be either.

Sure, it's nice to be able to say: I have this and this degree, I do this and this in the community, I volunteer here and here, I I I I I. But is that what is MOST important? Really?

I'll be honest. Sometimes I have a VERY difficult time being a mom. There are really only a few things that I can actually stand to play and unfortunately, my boys are not interested in them. They want to play trains, cars, star wars, dress-up. They want to do the things that I have NO interest in. But I try to do it anyways. Why? Because it matters to them. I don't want to do laundry (it's the worst chore, no?). I don't want to clean a kitchen 3 times a day, or pick-up the legos my kids missed. But I DO want the things that doing the I-don't-want-to's bring. I DO want my kids in clean clothes, playing on a clean floor, eating good food that I can make for them. I DO want my kids to have an imagination. I DO want them to appreciate nature, listen to and learn to play good music, and know how to have fun with very little. I don't want them to become a slave to technology. I DO want them to be independent and learn to use the power of words. They should be curious, excited, engaged, and occasionally crazy. They are kids, after all. Those are things that stay-at-home moms teach kids to do. What to be. We have all the power in the world.
People who make policy, who sit at heads of state, who manage economies- they have nothing on the strength and power of a mom. Who are they? Elected or appointed. Temporary. Dispensable. Forgettable.
But who is a mom? Permanent. Included. Indispensable. Forever. Unforgettable. (for good or for ill, ask any psychiatrist)
And here's the best part: a Mom does not need to be the woman who actually gave birth to you. All adopted children know that.
A mom is the one who loves you and sticks with you and supports you and encourages you and helps you up when you fall NO MATTER WHAT.
But that comes at a price.
And sometimes that's a heavy price for a smart, educated, driven, ambitious woman to bear.

I gave up a LOT to be a stay-at-home mom and I know FOR A FACT that my cohorts in the mommy-world also have given up much of their immediate desires to raise a family. I wanted to get an advanced degree. Well, I started, and then my one-year-old baby had a seizure, stopped talking and was soon enrolled in early childhood intervention with an eventual diagnosis of Asperger Syndrome as well as struggling with echolalia. The work I have put into him ALONE has been a huge undertaking. But I felt like there were more people who needed to be a part of my family. Now, as a family of 4, we still feel there is another who needs to come. And I will stay-at-home with my children gladly.

And my advanced degree? I do not want it right now.

David O.McKay is quoted as saying, "There is no success in the world that can compensate for failure at home."

Do you believe that?
I DO!

What ill of the world would not be improved except by a stay-at-home mom who cares, loves, instructs, corrects, and supports her children?

This is what weighs in the balance. A Mom makes ALL the difference. Not a PhD. Not a business. Not accolades, money, or power. The ultimate power is in being a Mother.

Someday I will look back on what I've done. What will be the most important? I think it will be the things that bring me joy. Things that give me a feeling of fulfillment. Will that be hours spent in a library or in front of a computer achieving another couple of letters after my signature at the expense of my kids? No! It will be the things I did with my kiddos. The many trips to the park, the swimming, the sidewalk chalk, the reading stories, the science projects, the piano recitals, the soccer games, the swim meets, the camping trips and everything else that a parent is BLESSED to do with their children, as well as the rough parts: scraped knees, broken hearts, bullying, homework, failed dreams, belligerent attitudes, hard work that doesn't pay off etc.  The things that brought my parents joy will be the things that bring me joy.

Now there are still things that I get to do for "me time" each day. I run alone. I do yoga. I sew. I play piano for myself. Occasionally, I cook a REALLY nice dinner for D and I, and my kids eat PBJ. I go on dates with my husband. There is plenty of "me" time built into my day- lest you understand from my thoughts here that I am a slave to my family. NOT true. But my overriding occupation is a mom!

I was so moved by this nice lady's statement of simple occupation- being a stay-at-home mom. Ecclesiastes says, "To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven."
This is my time to be a stay-at-home mom.
Another time will come when I am no longer needed to raise children in my home. And that will be an exciting new chapter.
So, I will not be ashamed. I will not answer the question "so what do you do" with "I'm a piano teacher", or any other peripheral occupation.
I will answer, "I have the privilege of staying home with my children".

Merry Christmas 2012

Season's Greetings

from the Daily’s.

We have had quite a year and would like to

share a bit about it with you.

Drue - This has been a very big year for Dr. N. Drue Daily. As you can see, he graduated from the University of Nebraska–Lincoln with his DMA Composition. In addition to graduating, his Symphony In Three Marches is currently nominated for the Folsom Distinguished Dissertation Award Prize. The University just can’t seem to get enough of him, so he’s a Lecturer of Music in the music department, and he likes it. Good thing too. He just accepted a call to serve as the sunday school president in church and is a huge help to Ashley with the boys as she teaches piano. And in his “spare” time, he is building a small music typesetting business.
Ashley - Ashley is in love with the family’s new Petrof piano and the beautiful music it makes. She is still teaching piano and is very happy with the progress her studio is making. Running the Olathe, Kansas Oz Half-Marathon is becoming a yearly tradition for her and it’s almost time to start training again! All in all, this has been a very blessed year for her.
James - James started taking piano lessons this year and he loves it. He even wrote his first piece of music for the piano: Pancakes. He is in first grade at Humann Elementary and is very much enjoying school, his friends, and he even likes to do his homework. James loves to dress up still and is very into skeletons, Harry Potter, and still a bit into super heroes. He’s also learning how cool Legos are. Drue is happy about that.
Oliver - Oliver turned 3 this year and is such a joy! He loves to help his mommy do just about anything and particularly likes to sit on the counter and help her cook. He’s getting pretty good at cracking an egg. He loves to dance and sing, and play piano with his mom. Oliver is enamored with trains, particularly Thomas the Tank Engine, and is also loving his hot-wheel cars. He’s such a pleasant boy, we all adore him.
May the Lord bless you and keep you in his loving arms this new year,

Drue, Ashley, James, and Oliver

The Daily's

schoolwork

Here are the answers James provided to the questions on his schoolwork. They were instructed to write a sentence or a simile describing each month.

January- New year
February is... Love Day
March is... Same patrics Day
April is.... Easter time
May is.... flowers day
June is.... Beach time
July is.... 4th year to cellebrate Nebraska
August is... James's birth day
September is... about racking leaves
October is.... Halloween
November is... Thank's Giving
December is... Santa Claws's Birthday

I love 1st graders!

to do list

Things I'm trying to get around to doing:
blogging about James' birthday
sending out pictures to all the parents of their children who attended James' birthday party
blogging about James' first day of school- 1st grade edition
fall cleaning- the big one!
figuring out what we need to replace, recycle or refashion in our home
then doing that
trying to come up with some ideas for the craft fair in december
working on testing the recipes in 'the' cookbook
trying to not gain 10 lbs. while testing those recipes
blogging about my birthday (it's on thursday) and the amazing things I have planned for my birthday bash- two words: Tamale Party.

also, I need to potty train Oliver.
But I am dreading that moment. Not out of any true concern for my ability to produce a potty-trained child. No. It is because I hate potty training. I don't even have a pinterest board for it, I hate it so much.

thanks for listing to my list.

6 years

Vital Statistics
Name: James Vaughan Daily
Birthday: August 8
Height: 45.5 inches
Weight: 44 lbs.- ish
Favorite things to do: Ride bikes, run, play on the swings (you learned how to swing yourself just 3 days ago!), make-believe play that you are at various times Spiderman, Batman, Pirates, Angry Birds, astronaut, chef, animals of all kinds, and (very recently) Harry Potter. You like playing with Legos, reading books that have anything to do with skeletons, dinosaurs, Henry and Mudge, Dr.Seuss (you are just now understanding the funny things in his stories, for example: Oliver Boliver Butt sent you into hysterics for a couple of days), and you love going out to our friend's farm to chase chickens. As a matter of fact, you actually caught one last week!
You have no fear! Every time we go to the zoo, you head straight for the bug building and ask to hold every single bug you can! You love to pick up bugs from the sidewalk and just look. You say they tickle you.
You have learned to swim pretty well this year. We're working on learning to swim with our head above water. Keep working on moving your arms!
You LOVE to draw and your coloring is getting so good! When you really focus, your pictures are just beautiful! You are especially good at manipulating letters. We love your drawings and how you collage your walls!
Every little girl at church has a crush on you because you're just so cute! And we all love you very much.

Happy 6th Birthday to my big boy!

On why I do not have pictures nor a story about this summer

For those who are just DYING for an update on my little family, here it is.
It's going to be short.
And sweetness may have no part in my writing.

What we have done in the routine:
YMCA
swim
library
park
zoo
bowling
summer academy

What we have done out of the routine:
DCI in Omaha.
water sports at the lake with good friends.
Fireworks.

So, as you can see, our summer has been VERY tame. I make sure we have something to do every day- it get's us out of the house for most of the day and I am the kind of person to DO things when I spend time with my family.

Mostly, though, this has been a summer of enormously lazy proportions.
The kind of summer you look back on and say:
"What did we do?"
"Nothing."
"Oh yeah! That was awesome."

So, to those long summer days, I've enjoyed you. It's actually starting to get dark around 9 o'clock now.
Soon, the trees will start to turn.
Soon, football will rule the town.
Soon, school will start and for the first time in our entire marriage, I will not send my husband to school.
That will be weird.

Summer days, driftin' away, but- oh! Oh those summer nights...

Kindergarten is closed

Or,
I now have a 1st Grader.

This school year has FLOWN by! James has made such HUGE strides in school- both academically and behaviorally. At the beginning of the year, he was having a hard time using his words to express his feelings, whether positive or negative. Now, he can tell me what he is feeling and why! This is a big deal here!
Also, he has discovered art.  His art teacher told him he was her best art student in the Kindergarten level.
I'm not surprised. It runs in the family. But I'm proud of him! At the beginning of the school year, he was having a very difficult time following instructions. Now, he completes all his assignments on his own! It's amazing!!!
Of course, none of this could happen without his amazing teachers: Mrs. Jill Gable, Mrs. English, and Mrs. McNaught. They have been just wonderful and I love them so much!

 This is at the beginning of the year:

 And this is at the end:

On to first grade!!!
And piano lessons, and swim lessons and soccer and everything else.